Thursday, March 13, 2014

2012 All Hockey Hair Team Review

Yesterday we looked at the 2011 All Hockey Hair Team as chosen by the good folks over at Pulltab Productions, and it was awesome.  So today let's take a gander at 2012.

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0:01 - I can't tell you, Company, just how much I like the slow panning shot of the newspapers with brackets and hair prize combs and hockey tape.

0:15 - I feel like Rust-o-leum is not necessary on plastic combs.

0:21 - Props in the introductions?  Not in year two.  In a few more years once this becomes super popular - and it will be - the players will catch on and start using the props.  Just be patient young grasshopper.

0:42 - The goalie sprint has been a staple of hockey introductions for years.  It never once occurred to me that they were doing it to make their hair blow.  It all makes sense to me now.

0:53 - As we have come to expect for the All Hockey Hair Team broadcast, great color commentary, noting that the amount of product kept the young man from getting the hair movement he was obviously striving for.

1:04 - Hair-mantown!  It could also have been Her-MANE - town.  That would have been good, too.

1:18 - Half of the Combo Platter is nothing but forehead. 

1:30 - The stare and the hair. 

1:30 - "Part shower cap with a little bit of fro."  That is right on the money.  I am disappointed they did not comment on the pseudo beard facial treasure trail that the kid has going on his face.

1:47 - The coach does have perfect hockey coach hair.

1:53 - This guy doesn't have a mustache, so I know he doesn't watch Magnum, P.I.  In fact, I am pretty sure that your TV has technology built into it these days that can sense what you look like, and if you aren't sporting a glorious 'stache or wearing super short shorts or named T.C. it will block out the Magnum, P.I. channel.

2:05 - "If he said "hi" to anyone it would be his stylist." Brilliant!  I almost lost my shit on that one.

2:15 - Good catch on the unevenness of the classic mullet. I am continually impressed by the quality of the color commentary. As long as the narrator is wearing a Don Cherry jacket.

2:23 - I am going to try the Pop Tart.

2:42 - A team award for the first time ever!  Hair team shocker!  And it all starts with their coach, right?

3:00 - Music!?  NO WAY!  Rockin out like all the great hairstyles.  Special props to the Pulltab crew though because they did not go for the usual hair song suspects - "Whip My Hair", or anything from the musical Hair.  So they made a solid choice.  Anything by Blondie would have also been appropriate for this application but I am not sure everyone would have gotten the reference.

3:55 - Good note on the mustache.  "It's not thick enough to block shots yet..."  Hilarious!  It is also not thick enough to watch Magnum, P.I.

3:55 - I am also a little concerned about this kids sort of weird, off centered and strange sized multiple soul patches he has going on.  What the hell, guy?

4:02 - Surprised by the Clark Gable.  Good recovery though.  The narrator is a pro.

4:18 - Applies the term "Combo Platter" to a completely different situation than it was before.  They need to get someone in to control their continuity.  But I do suppose there are millions of different kinds of combo platters in this world, so we will let it slide.  This one is the always popular head/facial hair combo platter.

4:40 - Planning for next year.  Solid.  Also, I want someone to carve me in butter.  It seems only appropriate.

The last three minutes of this video are just the hair song playing.  I wish they would have put a montage behind it.  That would have been glorious.  But oh well.  Still a great video.  Tomorrow we will look at the 2013 All Hockey Hair Team.

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