|Looks like The Love Boat without the boat part...so I guess this is what love looks like. If you don't see this image when you look at your wife, husband, or child, then you don't love them. Sorry.|
|Teapot Dome, which neither looks like a teapot or a dome.|
If you spend even one moment looking through that list, you will agree with me that this is out of fucking hand, Company. You have to agree. What is shows is a severe and crippling lack of creativity from just about every news outlet in America. Do you want to know what the largest modern political scandal in Italy was called? Tangentopoli. Which means approximately "Bribe City." Brilliant. Meanwhile we are stuck with something called "Spygate" which happened not once, but twice, and did not involve a single spy in the traditional, James Bond sense.
Now I am not suggesting that we give a new an unique name for each scandal that happens around the world. Our news media are not smart enough for that, and they have way too short of an attention span anyway. But the least they could do is change things up, and I submit that we look to Teapot Dome as inspiration. There was also a scandal known as "Operation Plunder Dome" which sounds pretty cool, doesn't it? I think that "Sonicdome" sounds a lot cooler than "Sonicgate." Ditto "Slutdome" and "Nippledome." My, I think that gave me an erection. I would be riveted to both of those scandals, and the gentleman's clubs that go by those names will appreciate the free advertising I am sure.
Just think about it, because something has to change. I can't take any more "-gates." I just can't. It is on the verge of becoming an endemic problem, which as things currently stand, would have to be called "Gategate," and that would cause a rip in the space/time continuum. We might as well just cross the streams. Or, we could just get creative and close the "-gate." Yeah, let's just close the "-gate."