Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Eight Things I Like About Top Ten Lists

TS Hendrick over at The Non-Review posted 10 Things I Hate About Top 10 Lists, which is a little tongue-in-cheek but inspired me to do a List of Ten anyway, because I haven't done one in a long time, and because I don't feel like putting any effort into coming up with clever word things, which is number 9 on his list.  I know that it is a lazy substitution for a post (#10) but I am a lazy sack.  So here goes:

1.)  It is a lazy substitution for a post.  Yeah, that's right.  I am a lazy person, I just said that before.  Plus, sometimes you just don't want to do it, you just don't want to have to come up with something fresh and new and creative, or you just don't want to type.  That is why I miss days from time to time, and a top ten list is a really easy way for me to put out a post without having to work all that hard or think all that much.

2.)  I don't have to put any effort into coming up with anything clever.  That's not true.  Sometimes a top ten list can be even more difficult, especially when you only have 6 or 8 points that you want to make.

3.)  I like to break promises to you, Company.  Yep, I know, I am a certified douchebag asshole for it but sometimes I like to promise you a list of ten things but then only come through with like, oh, say nine.  Or seven.  Or I like to promise you a list of five and then go the extra mile and give you eight.  I find it funny.  You probably find it annoying and frustrating.  And you probably hate me for it.  But it keeps you on your toes, right?

4.)  You can always change the title.  If you are concerned with actually being truthful with the readers, and you can only come up with nine items to comment on, you can just go back and change the title to a "Top Nine" list.  That works well,  AND it serves to set you apart from the crowd because everyone does Top Ten lists, but how many people do a Top Nine?

5.)  You are always in peril of being sued by David Letterman.  He does those Top Ten lists from time to time, and he has a lot more money backing him than I ever will, so you can't tell me that he or one of his minions hasn't gone out of their way to trademark the term "Top Ten."  I mean, Charlie Sheen trademarked "winning."  Maybe I will trademark "the."  That'll give me a lot of residual checks.

6.)  Ten has appeal worldwide.  Not everyone speaks the English language out there, Company, so not everyone will recognize all your pretty words and witty turns of phrase.  But everyone counts and measures in some way or another, and outside of the US they do it by tens.  It is called the Metric system and it is based on the number ten, so a Top Ten list will feel comfortable and normal to those in say, Zambia.

7.)  Choice.  Yep, choice.  If you are doing a normal blog post you have to write about things.  If you are doing a Top Ten list you can choose to comment on every point like I have done here, you can choose just to make your points like they did at The Non-Review, or one could even choose to do pictures, which is really fun but sometimes hard to put together.  It is all about choice.

8.) Variety.  I write blog posts every day.  I don't do a ton of Top Ten lists.  So it creates a little variety for those people who actually read the blog every day.  It is just a little taste of something different for them and me.

So those are eight reasons why I like Top Ten lists and will continue to do them.  How do you feel about that?  I would like you to give me your answer in list form though...

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