Friday, January 28, 2011

Lessons from AFV

       America's Funniest Home Videos, as it was called when I was a kid and Bob Saget hosted it, has been on for like 20 years or so.  Now called America's Funniest Videos or AFV, the format really hasn't changed much over time.  People send in their videos of their kids or husbands doing stupid shit, their pets doing thing, and people they know getting hit with all sorts of stuff like baseball bats or footballs to the nutsack.
Another man forgets the lessons learned on AFV.
      Well, I was watching it today on ABC Family or wherever it has been relegated to, and first I was struck by the fact that the video that was sent in was from 1995.  Taking into account that the episode I was watching was probably produced and put together sometime in 2010, that means that they sat for FIFTEEN YEARS on that video before they decided that their child getting lambasted by a giant snowball like he was in a Looney Tunes cartoon or something was funny enough to cash in on the ten grand that is first prize for each episode.  Fifteen years.  Either that or they are just REALLY bad about setting the clock on their camera, which by the way you could totally tell was one of those old school ones that still takes the whole tape.
     My second question that I came up with in my mind is this:  Why haven't we figured out to avoid this stuff?  I mean, we have been watching people standing right next the pinata and getting whacked in the head for like nineteen years, why are we still standing right next to it?  We know we are going to get whacked in the head.  We have been watching people line up all these rickety ramps to do sweet tricks with their dirtbike and kiddie pool and biffing it for two decades.  We know that the ramp is going to break, they are going to crotch the bar, then flip ass over teakettle into the kiddie pool.  We have seen it countless times.  So why is it that we continue to do stupid ass shit?  Everyone has seen that show somewhere along the way, and as such we should all know better than to put ourselves in that situation.
    So that is that.  We should know better.  We shouldn't be getting whacked like that anymore.  The whole getting hit in the sack thing is okay like when your kid hits the baseball back at you when you are pitching, and the pet stuff is alright.  But please, learn from AFV and keep yourself safe.  Or at least wear a cup and maybe a helmet.

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