Wednesday, January 19, 2011

At the Car Wash

     Deepest apologies to everyone out there for not giving you something new and exciting OR old and washed up yesterday, but I was at the doctor's with The Sickness, still, trying to get some answers, which didn't leave me much time to peck something out, old school style, with my two index fingers.  Anyhoodle, as they say, I am here now, and that is all that should matter, isn't it?
     Today I want to talk about the car wash.  I live in a northern climate, and as such when you get to January there tends to be a lot of salt and salt residue on the roadways, which means that by some sort of transference that science can't even begin to understand, your car will also be covered with salt if you go anywhere that is beyond, say, seven blocks from your house.  And so as I have been driving around a lot lately, my car was covered with salt.  So I went to get it washed, because that is what grownups do.
Why would you back out of line from this?
     Anyway, I was waiting in line to get into the car wash; there was a car waiting in front of me and there was a car in there getting washed.  Actually, check that: There was a truck in front of me and a car in getting washed.  So I am hanging out and trying to decide which of the many washes to get, because I just sort of wanted the salt off but I wanted the underbody flush as well, so I am looking at the board of options and all the sudden I realize that the truck in front of me has its backup lights on.  And he is not just like readjusting himself to go into the car wash at the correct angle, he was backing out to leave.
     What's with that shit?  Who backs out of a car wash?  Who suddenly decides that, no, their car is clean enough and a little water and soap won't make the situation any better?  That's fucked up.  No no no, once you are in line at the little pay thing you are committed to the wash, especially if you have paid.  And you want to know what is the craziest thing?  That is the second time I have had the person in front of me back out of the car wash.  The first time they were actually INSIDE THE BUILDING when they decided they weren't up for it.  In that instance I think the car wash might have been broken, but still...that is almost unprecedented.  I just cannot accept that backing out of the car wash has become standard in our society.  I just think there is something to be said for the commitment. 
      So if you are line, make sure you go through with your car wash.  Your car deserves it what with all the crap it puts up with from you.  Besides, backing out of the car wash is just so nerdy and lame.  So go through.  Look forward to a clean car, and enjoy your car wash.

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