Saturday, December 11, 2010

The Cactus Christmas is Not For Me

     I am sorry, but I saw a guy on TV selling Christmas trees down in Florida with clear, sunny skies and palm trees in the background and he was talking about chopping trees in 80 degree weather and how much it sucked and I was like, fuck that shit.  You can keep your warm Christmas.
     You know that Corona ad where the person is whistling "O Tanenbaum" and then he plugs in the Christmas lights on the palm tree.  Well you can have that too.  I understand that it is all a function of where you live and where you were brought up and all that jazz, but to me it just doesn't seem like Christmas is right without some snow on the ground and a little cold in the air.  If you were born and raised in Florida, then maybe decorating your Christmas tree in 82 degree weather and swimming more than a half hour after Christmas dinner is the norm, and that is what you like.  And that is okay.  I am just saying that it is not for me.  Just like if you are from Arizona and you brave the spines to put your lights on and presents under a cactus, that is cool.  It just doesn't seem right to me.
     Not that it is morally wrong or anything, it just doesn't fit my ideas of Christmas.  Part of that is probably because of what the popular media always sort of portray as Christmas, but I really do believe that it is more of a function of where you have grown up and your experience.  I always felt that coziness should be a big part of Christmas, and there is something about having the window open and the air conditioning on that just destroys the coziness. But put some snowflakes in the air, darkness that comes at around 4 pm, and a 4 degree wind chill, and your grandparents' living room packed with relatives sounds pretty cozy now doesn't it?
     So that is that.  I am not saying that tropical or semi-tropical or generally warm Southern Hemisphere Christmas is wrong, it just doesn't feel like Christmas to me.  I know that I have been going on recently about how the holidays are about celebrating and family and all that good stuff, which is true.  But a little atmosphere can't hurt, now can it?

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