Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Golf Sorcerer

     A lot of stupid and crazy and off-the-wall shit happens in California.  Seriously, it is one of the reasons why a lot of people want to push it out into the sea.  That being said, one of the things that happens in California is that there are a lot of fires that burn the dried out vegetation in the canyons and mountains outside of L.A, which - by the way - is where all the genius L.A. people are building their houses.  Bold strategy, how is that working out for you?  Anyway, in the land of fire and r-tards, it shouldn't be surprising that they found a new and innovative, yet unintentional, way of setting things aflame.
     A couple of months ago, back in the dry season at Shady Canyon Golf Course in Irvine, California, a golfer hit into the rough.  Fair enough, it happens all the time.  According to General Manager Steven Buck, as the man attempted to hit out of the rough, his pitching wedge or whatever he was hitting with, struck a resident rock, and metal-on-stone caused a spark that ignited a wildfire.  A wildfire that covered roughly 25 acres and required 150 Orange County firefighters to put out.
     Wow, talk about a bad day on the course.  When you see those bumper stickers that say "A bad day golfing is better than the best day at work," those bumper stickers don't cover days like this.  Not at all.  I wonder how it went, because I imagine he hit his shot, and then the spark smoldered in the grass for a little while before it began to be a little flame and then spread from there.  But this was super tinder dry California grass.  So it might have just gone up in flames right away, while the golfer was walking away and thinking about which club to use to make the 98 yards to the pen, and he heard the crackling and whirled around and then rough was on fire.  That would be nutso, but the picture below sort of lends that some credence in my mind.
An innovative golfer takes matters into his own hands when the club won't remove the rough at Shady Canyon Gold Club in Irvine, California.  Photo courtesy of Yahoo! Sports.
   So the good thing in all of this is that no one was hurt, and there was limited property damage, although I would suspect that the greens keeper will be having nightmares about this one for some time.  I am going to avoid making any of the usual "The course is on fire!" jokes because that was played out the moment that club hit that rock and created that spark.  If you want those I will leave them to your own devices.  Until then maybe use the old wooden drivers.

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