Wednesday, February 04, 2009

China Beach

Through the mirror of my mind,
Time after time,
I see reflections of you and me.

Reflections of
The way life used to be,
Reflections of
The love you took from me.

Diana Ross sang that song, but I usually manage to pull, from way back in the back corner of my mind, the following images when I hear that tune:

Yeah, that's right.  China Beach.  It was always coming on as my mom herded me to bed so all I ever saw was the opening sequence.  But it is permanently and indelibly etched into my memory.  The point here is the reflection.  Looking back.  That theme has been weighing heavy on my mind as of late.  Sitting at my desk.  Walking down the frigid street and wondering why the Sheriff's Department has a station wagon for a cruiser (if I ever get arrested I am going to request that they transport me in that thing, it's fitting).  Wandering around The Worldwide Headquarters in my underoos and peering out the window at what's happening on the street below.  While I am waiting for my car to warm up.  Whatever it is I am doing.  I am constantly reflecting on our time together, Company.  Where we began and where we have come.  And not just because we are 300 posts in (which, coincidentally we are) but because I was bored at work the other day and had no desire whatsoever to do anything productive, so I started going back through The Filing Cabinet and reading some of my old posts.  And you know what?  They were good.  Really good.  They weren't forced, they weren't shoehorned into a certain type or category, they just were.  There was an ease in their manner, to borrow the phrase from Earnest Lawrence Thayer.  And I think that was what made them so good.
     I have always maintained that from my small time in the blogosphere, that some of the posts I wrote that I thought would be great were not well received, and most of the ones that people came to love the best I thought would flop.  It's true.  I am not sure why, but it doesn't matter.  The bottom line is that, with me, in everything in my life, I am at my best when I think there is nothing on the line.  And that's what I need to get back to.  A dose of free and easy, off-the-cuff, whatever is on my mind blogging mixed with a dose of random reflection and a touch of paternalistic advice, with just a dash of raging anger towards things that piss me off.  Just like mom used to make.  And just like I used to do back in the day.  So that's what I am going back to, whether or not you like it, Company.  But I am pretty sure you will.

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