But do worry about me trying to live for four harrowing days without television. I don't know if you've ever been to my house, but it is very, very rare for me to be home without the TV on. I am not always watching it, but I love to have the background noise, and I can FEEL it. Yeah, I know, that sounds strange. But I can feel it in my internal body parts when the TV is on. I don't know if its the radiation emanating from the tube, or the electricity buzzing through the air, but I can feel it. Even if the sound is muted. It's strange, I know. But I don't have the time or energy to make this shit up.
Now, I do have some options. I can go out and spend all evening long surfing the Internet down at Pizza Hut. Probably not going to do that though, because I don't like Pizza Hut that much. I do have my DVD player and my old school VCR. And I can definitely hook those up without the cable being in there. That's no big deal. So I can watch movies. And I have a bunch of movies. In fact, I've been itching to watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail for like three weeks. So I will probably do that. But generally, I am not a movie kind of guy. I will watch a movie. I will enjoy it. I might even buy it. But I don't generally watch them very often. So maybe I will catch up on some of those. But still, I am not a movie kind of guy.
I could just turn the radio on and listen my beloved Milwaukee Brewers on the radio while I unpack my things and get the Worldwide Headquarters set up. But that will kill maybe one night if that. Plus, I have other plans for getting my stuff unpacked. So what the hell am I going to do? I won't have made enough of a mess to have to clean already. I suppose I could just explore the town. Maybe take my kayak out a time or two.
A third option is that I can read a book. And I like to read books. I have tons of books, and they will all be unpacked. In fact, I have one that I have been working on and I really want to finish. And I have another one on deck, waiting for me to start. So I could just hang out in my comfy chair and go to town. But it will feel odd I have to admit. I am not much of a sit down and read kind of guy either. I tend to do it in the bathroom (I admit) or when I am lying down in bed. But I suppose that that is a good enough idea. It will even make me seem almost cultured in front of my new neighbors. But I am still not sure about it.
"Now Big Dave, settle down. Don't get so excited." I can hear you say. "Why don't you just go old school, hook up some rabbit ears, and pick up some local broadcast stations?" Well, that is a fantastic idea Company. Believe you me that I have already thought of that option. But there are two problems that I can see with that. First of all, broadcast network TV sucks balls. I mean, have you seen it? Besides, I watch stuff like The History Channel or National Geographic Channel or ESPN. I don't do Dancing with the Stars. I don't do Survivor. I guess I will have to start. The second problem is that there are only two broadcast TV stations that come in at the new Worldwide Headquarters IF YOU HAVE A GIANT ANTENNA ON TOP OF YOUR HOUSE. Which I will not. So I doubt if even the most powerful rabbit ears will help with my cable ready TV. Besides, using my TV with crappy rabbit ears is like using a sports car with a lawn mover engine. Okay, well, not really. My TV is pretty nice, but it's not that nice. It's more like using a family sedan with a lawn mover engine. That's better. But it still sucks.
So, needless to say I am apprehensive. I will feel so naked without my television. I will feel like a fish out of water without my television. I can already start to feel it now...so lonely. So cold.